Mental exhaustion

While watching the intelligent, informed, well-spoken Al Gore on last night's Daily Show, I was overcome by a feeling of profound grief, a devastating sense of loss that pervaded every muscle, every pore, every cell of my body. It was an overwhelming blanket of sadness at the thought of what could have, and should have, been, which ultimately forced my frustrated and terminally depressed brain to simply shut down and seek refuge in the peaceful oblivion of sleep.

Because when I look at the "news" dominating our media landscape, I no longer know what to say about what America has become after five and a half years under the thumb of George the Younger and his odious disciples. It is no longer my America, of that I'm certain. Under the stewardship of a corporate-owned cabal of conservative sociopaths, it is a nation that's come to represent the worst aspects of human nature both at home and abroad.

And I increasingly fear that we're powerless to do anything about it.

Hypocrisy. Militarism. Torture. Homophobia. Indefinite detention without trial. Dismissal of Constitutional protections. Rampant cronyism and corruption. Celebration of mediocrity. Rejection of science. Aversion to diplomacy. Economic irresponsibility. Apathy toward the poor, the unemployed, the uninsured. Suppression of information and dissent. Criminal malfeasance and ineptness without accountability. A politically biased judiciary. Fearmongering and warmongering.

Oh, and lying. Lots and lots of lying.

These are but a few of the repellent characteristics that have come to define the ol' Red White and Blue in the 21st Century, and we have 12 years of Republican governmental control, and 6 years of Democratic impotence, to thank. The daily erosion of the promise of America fills me with such rage that, ironically, I'm left feeling totally incapacitated. Why, at my son's graduation a few weeks ago, I even found myself unable to recite the Pledge of Allegiance in unison with the crowd of beaming onlookers, each word sticking in my throat as I thought of how the tenets of America have been relentlessly betrayed by those purporting to lead it.

So today I'm bereft of ideas. Sure, I could comment on the idiocy of Orrin Hatch, or the repulsive agenda of Denny Hastert, or the calculated mendacity of George Bush himself. But to what end? When I go to bed tonight, they'll still hold their respective positions of authority, determining the direction of policies which will continue to sully the dream of democracy.

And they'll inexplicably continue to have legions of faithful supporters.

I guess it's just mental exhaustion that's inciting today's feeling of utter despair. My apologies. I'll try to be better, more proactive, tomorrow. Hopefully by then I'll have found a renewed energy, optimism, and purpose. After all, if I don't, then the real terrorists - those who threaten the glorious potential of America from within - will truly have won.